I talked to a therapist today. She said to be gentle with myself when I’m feeling overwhelmed or fearful of the future and notice when my body is giving me physical cues about my mental distress. It sounds simple, but it’s so hard for me to do.

Things that she reassured me about:

• It’s normal to want community and stability. You’re not selfish for looking for that and it does often dictate where people move. That’s how humans work and it’s okay.
• I feel most valued and loved and supported when I’m doing work for and with a community I care about. With everything virtual right now, it is understandable that I am feeling alone, but community building is changing to accommodate this.
• It’s okay to want a community to support you and also want to have a better relationship with yourself so that you can feel supported when you’re alone.
• It’s okay to be sad and still hopeful for the future. But know that I have a lot ahead of me and that this uncertainty will pass.
• I am worthy even when I don’t feel like it. I don’t have to do something big or noteworthy to take up space in this world. It’s okay
• It’s okay to make goals and not know exactly how you’ll reach them. You’ll figure it out day by day.
• Being in the moment is hard when there are so many things in the future to think about. It’s okay to not be perfect at that.

My goals for now:

• Enjoy the time I have left here with people I care about
• Eventually get a job that makes me economically stable and fulfills me in the advocacy field
• Reach out to people when I need support and know that I’m not too much of a burden
• Be kind to myself and talk to myself like I would to a friend